Guideline on Hugs

I found an article that I wanted to share about hugs.

I do not agree with all the different types of hugs, but it is still interesting.
The hand shake never made it to my hug list. It is just too formal and unemotional most of the time. But I have some male friends who are really uncomfortable with a tradional hug - so they will be happy that it is included in the hug list.

Any way - here is the article. I kept the by-line so credit is given to the author.

A Guide To Hugging
Learn Common Hugging Techniques And Etiquette
By Salena Quinn

A hug is a form of nonverbal communication and is the most common way to express love and affection. Everyone needs physical contact to survive, and hugging is an act of giving and receiving the support and love people need. The type of hug shared between two people can speak volumes about their relationship and can also strengthen bonds. Contrarily, a lack of hugs and other forms of physical affection can diminish the quality of romantic relationships and make some people experience increased emotional stress.

A hug is usually initiated by holding out one’s arms and waiting for the other person’s response. Don’t feel rejected if someone declines a hug. People have many different reasons for declining a hug, therefore there is no need to take it personally. Use the following guide to discover common hugging techniques and etiquette, and learn the difference between the way males and females hug.

Hug Etiquette
There are some basic, unwritten rules about hugging that most people are intuitively aware of. When deciding to hug or not to hug a person, refer to the following rules of hug etiquette:

-Always respect another person’s space.
-Ask permission before hugging someone, unless you are already on intimate terms with the person.
-Hug accordingly. Remember, there is a difference between a friendly hug and a passionate embrace. A hug between romantic partners is much different than a hug between two people who have just met.
-Never assume that it is okay to hug someone, even if you have hugged the person many times before.
-Practice good hygiene. Body odor can be offensive to the person you are embracing.

Types of Hugs
There are many different types of hugs that can be used in a plethora of situations. The type of hug two people partake in speaks volumes about their relationship. The duration of the hug, as well as the physical proximity of the two people involved determines the depth of the relationship. Below is a guide explaining common types of hugs, how to determine when it is appropriate to engage in each type of hug and instructions for performing each hug:

Me-Hug – Just as the name implies, this is a hug that you give to yourself. Simply wrap your arms around your torso and squeeze tightly.

Hand-Hug – This is the most common and frequently shared hug – a simple handshake. When in doubt about the appropriateness of hugging another person, simply extend your hand for a handshake. The hand hug is also the most appropriate form of affection in the workplace, used to congratulate or greet someone.

‘Hello’ Hug - This type of hug is usually employed when greeting a friend you have not seen for a while. This is the standard and most common type of non-intimate hug, usually lasting just a few seconds. This hug can be performed using one arm or two.

Bear Hug – A bear hug is a strong, full-body hug. This type of hug usually takes place between family members, close friends or lovers. The hugger and huggee wrap their arms tightly around each other and may rock back and forth while embracing to emphasize affectionate feelings. The duration of the hug tends to last a little longer than the standard hug, as well.

Cuddle – Cuddling involves hugging or embracing affectionately. The cuddle can also be described as a close, affectionate and prolonged embrace. Cuddling can involve stroking or caressing and is distinctive because of the duration of the hug. This type of hug typically occurs between children and adults, or lovers and can occur while sitting, standing or lying down.

Comforter – This type of hug is used to comfort someone close to the person. This hug is similar to the standard hug, however, it is distinctive because of its intensity and duration. This type of hug is usually performed by parents and close friends and is often used to console another person. The huggee may even rest his or her head on the shoulder or chest of the hugger for comfort.

Pound Hug – This type of hug is almost always performed between two males and is a combination between a handshake and a one-armed hug. The two participants aggressively slap each other on the back while embracing, as if to emphasize their masculinity. This type of hug usually lasts about one second. A hug lasting longer than a second usually makes the participants feel uncomfortable.

A-Frame Hug – This is where the two people sharing the embrace stand about a foot apart from each other and bend at the waist. Only the shoulders come into contact as the two people embrace. This type of hug is common between acquaintances or people who have just met.
Side-to-Side Hug –Two people stand next to one another, embracing around the waist or shoulders. Friends and lovers engage in this type of hug.

Cheek-to-Cheek Hug - This hug does not require the use of arms. Simply face the person you are hugging and press your cheek against his or her cheek briefly.

Reverse Hug – With the reverse hug, the hugger approaches the huggee from behind and puts his/her arms around the huggee’s waist. This type of hug is reserved for people who are in a romantic relationship.

Dancefloor Hug - This type of hug is also usually reserved for romantic partners. The woman puts her arms around the man’s neck while the man puts his arms around the woman’s waist. This hug is referred to as the dancefloor hug because this hug is usually performed while dancing.

Wandering Hands Hug – Typically performed between lovers, this hug involves exactly what the name suggests. The wandering hands hug is characterized by hands that roam around the back of the partner, gently caressing him or her for the duration of the hug.

Hugging Between Men and Women
Hugging between men and women can signify attraction or friendship, depending on the duration and type of hug. Women usually initiate hugging with men and are often expected to dictate the type of hug that will take place, as well as the duration of the hug. Women also typically desire more hugs, as well as other forms of affection, than men. There are even studies that women’s heart health may benefit more from hugs than men.
According to an article in the San Francisco Chronicle, research shows that the female brain naturally releases oxytocin, a “bonding” hormone, after a 20-second hug. The embrace bonds the two people involved and triggers the brain's trust circuits. Few types of hugs last long enough to trigger the brain’s trust circuits, unless it is between couples or a comforting hug. This same theory does not apply to male huggers.

Women Hugging Women
Women hug other women to express friendship and warmth. It is quite common and acceptable for women to hug other women frequently and for long durations. Many people consider hugging a “feminine” act and this is part of the reason why it is so acceptable for women to hug other women. The hug that takes place between women may also involve a kiss on the cheek and increased touching after the hug takes place.

Men Hugging Men
Depending on the culture, men typically avoid hugging other men, preferring to shake hands instead. When a hug does take place between two heterosexual males, however, the duration of the hug is usually short and bodily contact is limited.

Men typically engage in the handshake-hug, where the two participants hug and shake hands simultaneously. Only the shoulders and chest touch, with the still-clasped hands bound together between the chests, creating a buffer zone. This type of hug is punctuated by aggressive back slapping while the two are still in an embrace, as if to say “I have positive feelings for you, but I want to show it in a way that is masculine.”

Workplace Hugs
In an age of sexual harassment lawsuits, workplace hugs are becoming less common. According to a survey by the American Management Association, nearly half of all people called hugging “sexual harassment.” Handshaking is much more acceptable in the workplace and less likely to make someone feel uncomfortable. The bottom line is use your best judgment when trying to determine if it is acceptable to hug a coworker. It is almost never okay to hug a superior; however, hugging a coworker who is also a friend is often viewed as acceptable.

Some people consider hugging an art form and those who don’t still benefit from its ability to calm the nerves and deepen bonds. Always remember to use proper etiquette when engaging in a hug and use your best judgment when hugging someone for the first time. Hugging is a wonderful way to show someone you care and can have amazing effects of both people involved. Happy hugging!